Being at home, as the main caretaker of your new baby, can be scary and tiring, especially if you are a first time mom. Figuring out how to bottle or breastfeed, how to get your baby’s arms through a shirt sleeve, or how to give a first bath can be challenging, particularly when you feel exhausted. You may need to ask help with chores, so you can focus on your baby and get some rest.

The First Few Days At Home

Both you and your partner may feel uneasy caring for your baby at first. Your new born may seem fragile and you may worry about doing something wrong. In addition, neither one of you may sleep particularly well because new babies do not sleep through the night. With all these changes in your daily rhythm, you may also wonder how you will manage going back to work in just a few weeks.

Realistic Expectations

It is important to realize that you will probably not have your life under control even several weeks from now. Being a parent is a messy business. Babies are unpredictable and with their arrival in our lives, they introduce an ever present element of surprise. However, living with this unpredictability will become easier with practice. Remember, babies are not as fragile as you might expect. Your baby just underwent a complete change in environment from a dark, cramped place to this bright, open world. With you close by, he or she can handle some parenting bloopers. Rest assured, your baby will enthusiastically inform you when things don’t go exactly the way he or she wants.

Accept that you will not be able to prevent all problems. Most moms worry about protecting their babies from diaper rashes, colic and so on and older moms may feel this even more if they have had a long wait to get pregnant or had a challenging pregnancy and birth. Take comfort in knowing that all parents have felt inadequate at some point. You will quickly learn how to handle things effectively, so don’t feel guilty if you are not an instant baby expert.

Just Baby And You

In the early days, before you become attuned to your baby’s more subtle signals, a lot of your actions may be a reaction to his or her crying. Communication is simple for babies if they are uncomfortable in any way, they cry. Crying can mean hunger a wet diaper, or just plain fussiness. Try not to let your baby’s crying make you resentful. It won’t take long before you get better at deciphering why your baby is crying and fixing the problem quickly. Soon the majority of your baby’s time should be crying free, unless he or she develops colic. Remember that crying is not harmful for your baby. If you feel that you are becoming overwhelmed and angry, it’s best to leave your baby safely in the crib and take a break for 5 minutes or so, then come back when you have calmed down.

Hold Your Baby When He Or She Is Sleeping Or Happy

In an attempt to create at least some time to get chores done in between feedings and diaper changes, it may be tempting to tiptoe out of your baby’s room as soon as he or she is calm enough to let you go. However, it’s important for you to spend some positive time with your baby. Have your new born go to sleep on your chest, listen to music, and take time to savor being a mom.

Soothing A Crying Baby

If your baby cries for more than a few minutes, even after you have changed and fed him or her, pick your baby up. If your baby cries a lot, use a baby carrier to keep him or her with you. Most babies are soothed by being held close to your body (or your partner’s). If this doesn’t work, try taking your baby out for a walk or a drive in the car. Many babies are soothed by music or the sound of household appliances such as washing machines and vacuum cleaners. Don’t worry about over pampering your baby. Calm, secure babies deal better with separation from their moms than anxious, lonely ones.

Dealing With Visitors

Visitors can help you feel supported and loved during the first weeks after the birth of your baby. A good conversation over a relaxing cup of coffee can provide a wonderful escape from diapers and burpings. However, it might be necessary to create some visiting boundaries that secure unstructured, restful time for you, as you get used to caring for your new born while still recovering your self. During the first few days, you may only want to see your closest family and friends. After this, set some visiting hours when your baby usually sleeps, perhaps so you can enjoy the time with your visitors.

How To Beat The Baby Blues

During the first few days and weeks after the birth of their babies, many women experience some emotional liability and crying jags, dubbed the baby blues. Try the following strategies to help. If these strategies don’t help, talk to your care provider. You may be one of the 10-15 percent of women who suffer from postpartum depression, a more serious condition that may require medical treatment.

Invite a friend to visit

Talking to some one who understands and listens can make all the difference.

Create time with your partner

Take the opportunities when they arise (when your baby sleeps, for example) to be alone with your partner.

Get out of the house alone

Ask your partner to baby sit for an hour or two so you can get out and see your own friends or do something you enjoy.

Join a support group

Interacting with others who are in the same situation can make you better.

Pamper yourself

Take a relaxing shower and pamper yourself when you can.

A missed menstrual period is usually the earliest evidence of pregnancy. A missed period in a woman between ages 15 and 45 with previously regular cycles suggests pregnancy as the most likely possibility. It is not a definitive sign, however, since there are many other causes for a delayed or even a skipped period.

Periods may be quite irregular toward the beginning and the end of the menstrual years, confusing the issue of whether or not a woman is pregnant. Recent childbirth, especially when a woman is nursing, may eliminate menses temporarily or lengthen the interval between periods .Illnesses, including untreated diabetes, thyroid gland disturbances, substance abuse, and high fever from infection may create menstrual irregularities. Severe malnutrition may lead to an absence of menstruation. Amenorrhea may occur in women who have lost weight rapidly on a very strict diet.

Ballet dancers and athletes, particularly those who train intensely for long-distance running, often stop menstruating. Psychological stress may also be responsible for the temporary disappearance of menses. Among the stresses might be adjustment to living in a new country or a change of occupation. Emotional upsets such as the death of a loved one can precipitate amenorrhea. Missed periods are not uncommon among young women who leave home for college.To confuse the issue further,you may be pregnant and still appear to menstruate during. early months. On close observation, such menstrual periods are different. Ordinarily they are shorter and scantier. A woman may menstruate 3 days instead of 5 at the normal time her period is due. A month later she menstruates half a day, the following month for an hour, and then her periods cease entirely for the remainder of pregnancy. Women may develop menstrual-like cramps at the time of the first missed period without any bleeding. They fully expect to menstruate each hour, but do not. The discomfort lasts for up to 3 or 4 days, then stops.

Breast Changes

Many women experience breast changes premenstrually. These changes include fullness and tenderness. These symptoms subside rapidly just before or with the onset of menstruation. When pregnancy occurs, the feelings of fullness and tenderness continue instead of disappearing, and become even more marked. In the very first weeks after conception, you may feel a tingling in your breasts, and they may become extra tender, with hypersensitive nipples. If you haven’t realized that your period is late, you may dismiss these feelings as premenstrual symptoms, but the tenderness usually is more intense than it is premenstrually. In fact, you may feel breast tenderness even before a missed period. In a second or later pregnancy, you will often recognize this intense sensitivity as an early sign of pregnancy.

Breast sensations in pregnancy usually are of short duration, the breasts remain large, but the feelings of tenseness and tenderness gradually disappear by the end of the third or fourth month of pregnancy. In preparation for lactation the mammary glands continue to increase in size during the remainder of pregnancy, the enlargement due in part to growth of the milk-secreting glandular tissue and in part to a greatly enriched blood supply. The latter is often manifested in the second half of pregnancy by the appearance of a delicate tracery of blue veins beneath the skin on the chest, especially noticeable in women with very fair skin.

The nipple and the colored circle of skin surrounding it-the areola­ enlarge and their pigmentation darkens. Arranged in a circular fashion around the periphery of the areola, near the skin edge, are a number of small, roundish elevations, or oil glands-in the inimitable words of William Fetherstone H. Montgomery, who first described them, “a constellation of miniature nipples scattered over a milky way.” These glands, called Montgomery’s glands or tubercles, become more prominent in pregnancy. In some women breast enlargement is accompanied by the formation of stretch marks in the skin, or striae. Since they appear more extensively over the abdomen.

Nipple Secretion

After the first few months a sticky, yellowish, watery fluid colostrum-may be expressed from the nipple by gently squeezing the breast. This finding is not absolute evidence of pregnancy, however. Women who have borne and nursed children may retain colostrum in the breasts for years. In the later months of pregnancy drops of colostrum may flow from the nipples spontaneously. As term is approached, the colostrum takes on an opaque, whitish appearance, more resembling milk.

Nausea and Vomiting

With today’s early pregnancy testing, most women already know :they are pregnant by the time they feel nauseated or vomit. However, nausea and vomiting in pregnancy are so common that they are considered reliable presumptive signs. These symptoms most frequently occur from 5 to 12 weeks after the last menstrual period, although you may reel nausea as early as 2 to 3 weeks after your last period. For some women this is the first clue that they are pregnant.

Nausea occurs in 50 to almost 90 percent of pregnant women and is often, though not always, accompanied by vomiting. In popular speech these symptoms have been cheerfully termed morning sickness, since the most usual time to experience nausea or to vomit is when you first awaken. Unfortunately, this term is not accurate since the symptoms can occur at any time of day.

Certain foods and odors, even familiar ones, can cause nausea and vomiting. Some pregnant women have difficulty cooking specific foods. Some women have the fortunate problem of becoming nauseated by the smell of smoke and so stop smoking early in pregnancy. A variety of reasons for nausea and vomiting have been proposed, but no one really knows why they occur. In the past, they were said to be psychosomatic, indicating perhaps ambivalence toward, or even aversion to, pregnancy, intercourse, or the baby’s father. In some studies, a placebo (or pretend pill) alleviated symptoms, which could be construed as supporting a psychological cause for their occurrence. Other studies, however, found women without nausea and vomiting to be more prone to psychological difficulties during pregnancy and after birth. Another possible reason for nausea and vomiting is hormonal changes, a theory supported by the fact that women on birth control pills, which contain the hormones of pregnancy (estrogen and progesterone), also frequently experience these symptoms.

The woman who vomits during the early months of pregnancy may notice that what she vomits is flecked or streaked with blood. This generally is not a cause for concern, as repeated vomiting may rupture a tiny blood vessel in the throat or esophagus. Such a small vessel clots quickly and heals spontaneously. You should notify your physician or midwife if you notice more than a minute amount of blood in the vomit or if it occurs more than once. Many instances are recorded of particularly suggestible husbands who vomit with their pregnant wives; there are even cases in which the husband vomited though his wife did not. In general, nausea and vomiting subside by 10 to 12 weeks of pregnancy, but may persist. If severe or prolonged, the vomiting may be a pregnancy complication called hyperemesis gravidarum.

Changes in Appetite

Newly pregnant women may notice a temporary decrease in appetite, and ordinary amounts of food may lead to fullness and bloatedness. Women often naturally find themselves ignoring scheduled mealtimes and instead eat frequent small meals-an excellent way to eat during pregnancy. It’s not harmful to the fetus to reduce your food intake in the first trimester, although you should take multivitamins that contain folic acid. If you experience nausea, however, try to avoid going for long periods of time without food. If your stomach is empty, you are more likely to become nauseated-and even to vomit-when you do eat. Of course, eating frequently to avoid nausea may mean that you may gain more than the few pounds usually gained in the first few months of pregnancy.

Some pregnant women develop a craving for one particular food almost to the exclusion of anything else. Earlier obstetrical texts gave more space and emphasis to what they termed pica, or cravings for unusual foods or nonfood substances, than newer texts. But the condition remains a relatively common one. Unquestionably diets are more diversified and better balanced today, and the opportunity to obtain milk, fruits, and vegetables at all seasons of the year is greater. Nonetheless, some women still describe such cravings during pregnancy .

Fatigue and Sleepiness

In many women one of the early symptoms of pregnancy is an unusual degree of sleepiness. The reason for this is unknown. The fatigue generally disappears after the end of the first 3 months, or trimester, of pregnancy, usually to recur near term.

Frequent Urination

Sometimes frequency of urination begins as early as the first day of a missed period. This is caused by pressure on the urinary bladder from the growing uterus. Urinary frequency disappears about the twelfth week, as the uterus grows out of the pelvis, relieving the bladder pressure. It often recurs a few weeks before delivery, when the baby’s head drops into the pelvis, again creating bladder pressure.